Potentially the entire world is aware of this fact, but today is the first day of the 2014 World Cup in Brazil!!!! I am beyond the beyond excited. I’ve collected my Panini Stickers (anyone wanna #GotGotNeed?), entered 600,000 office pools, and read an endless amount of World Cup player Power Rankings. I love men’s soccer and I couldn’t be more excited.
But I do want to take a quick second on this very exciting day to reflect on exactly that- this is men’s soccer. The people of Brazil obviously have a pretty big bone to pick with FIFA and the World Cup, and the fact that we’re so obsessed with soccer and spend so much money on soccer while people suffer is completely disgusting. And that’s something worth talking about, too, and people have been. So I want to just for a quick minute before I get subsumed into World Cup mania, reflect on another inequality.
When the men’s US National Team plays a FIFA qualifying match at a turf stadium, BRAND NEW GRASS is laid down on top of it, so they can play on grass. Playing on grass is MUCH, MUCH better than playing on turf. In fact, playing on turf can be downright dangerous and leads to injuries. So just for a World Cup qualifying match, the men are given a grass situation no matter what.
The U.S. Women’s National Team, the BEST IN THE WORLD, (our men’s team, whom I love, is laughable compared to the prowess and power of our women’s team) is playing THE ENTIRE WOMEN’S WORLD CUP on turf.
Read about it here. Abby Wambach has it right: this is insane, and such a clear form of sexism that I can barely stand it. This isn’t one of those insidious rape culturey things that’s totally awful yet hard to fix: this is BLATANT sexism that has an easy solution (put in grass) that officials refuse to do. I am angry.
And sure it seems like a small issue, but sexism in sports is insane. I do my best to be a good feminist, and women’s sports are an easy place to actually DO something! Do you want to actively fight sexism? Follow the NWSL teams on Twitter. Go to one women’s soccer game every year. Buy something small on USSOCCER.com from the women’s team. On the start of the World Cup, I want to encourage you to check out women’s soccer (and basketball and ice hockey and golf and lacrosse and softball and all of the sports), and do a little bit every once in awhile to support it. It too is the beautiful game.
So yes, I am INSANELY excited to root for our men’s team in this World Cup. But their victories will never be as sweet until we all play on grass and we all start calling it the Men’s World Cup.
Here’s a sketch I wrote for Ripley’s March show that Maggie Ross, Carrie Mc Crossen, Caroline Cotter, Zach Broussard, and Ken Beck shot out the park (baseball reference). I loved watching these nerds do this. They’re great! Oh ad Ben Wietmarschen directed the socks off this! (Baseball reference)
This is such a good sketch!
As a geography lesson, I didn’t learn much from this. As a sketch VERY VERY FUNNY. PLEASE WATCH.
We’re back from Spring Break! And like a couple of hot co-eds gettin wild for the cameras, we’ve brought our besty, Katie Simon, she of Legs For Days and Former Business Partners to get this party started. Ryan got his hair braided AND hepatitis. Taylor got a tribal arm tat and also hepatitis. But YOU got a great episode of Ten Ideas headed straight for your hepatitis hole. Get hip to hep and follow Katie Simon @kmsimon
After a little break, Ten Ideas is back with Katie Simon. We couldn’t wish for a greater bud to force our head in a big barrel of cold water to wake us up like in that movie. Here’s a fun game for this episode, see if you can count every misunderstanding. I bet you can’t.
The boys are back in town.
This was so fun! I think you will have lots of laughs if you listen to this excellent podcast.
Tonight is the last night of Don Fanelli and my show Sketches from an Italian Restaurant: A Billy Joel Sketch Show, at the UCB Theatre. I’ve had such an amazing time running this show the past six months and am so proud and so thankful that we got to share this stupid little show with the people of New York.
Last March me and Don were on a tour up at UMass. And like every tour ever we listened to some Billy Joel on the drive back home and all sang along. I think it was Captain Jack, but it honestly could have been Pianoman, Scenes from an Italian Restaurant, Allentown… any of his songs. God he is so good.
When we got back Don and I took the subway home. We were lamenting the fact that we were feeling complacent, that all too common feeling that you’re doing too much to get any sleep but you always should be doing more. Writing a one man show is what we should both be doing, but it just wasn’t as fun… and we both wanted to work on something that both made us remember what we love about comedy in the first place and also pushed us.
The next day I texted him what you see above. Sketches From An Italian Restaurant was a joke title for a show that I was telling people about for a year. “What are you working on Dru?” “Oh Sketches from an Italian Restaurant. It’s my one man show about Billy Joel.” Never in my wildest dreams did I think that show would see the light of day. Don even admits to getting my text and thinking it was a joke. I suspected as much and sent the follow up text: “I’m very serious about this.”
From there we started getting to work. And we really dove into this show the exact way we wanted. We’d meet for hours listening to Billy Joel songs and pitching the sketch ideas that they inspired (two favorite really dumb ones: You May Be Right I May be Crazy, but it just may be a lunatic your looking for. But the guy saying it is ACTUALLY a crazy person AND We watch the music video for Keeping the Faith and then just look at the audience and say WHAT?!). We’d write shitty first drafts and then just improvise off of them. We’d send sketches back and forth, constantly rewriting them… One of our sketches in the current show is on draft 30-something… we stopped keeping track.
We then went through seven months of rigorously writing and rehearsing and rewriting and rewriting and rewriting with the help of our directors Dan Klein and Will Hines. We moved sketches around. We added animations to a powerpoint. We wrote a dance number. We cut a dance number. We sat in a room with Will for four hours pitching black out after black out after black out. We came up with over 20, we cut that down to 9. We cut that down to eight. If it didn’t remain funny after an hour it was out.
It was a brutal machine of Sketch Darwinism at it’s finest. The only thing that stayed constant throughout were three videos about Captain Jack and masturbating. Even after we got the run we spent two more months rewriting. Our current pianoman sketch has maybe one line from our third spank… and that line is “Sing us a song you’re the pianoman”. My favorite thing about working with Don is that he’s never satisfied. It can always be funnier. And working on this show brought that out in me. If you’re bored of the show the common idea is to say let’s fuck around on stage. No. Make it tighter. If we had the balls to title a show Sketches From An Italian Restaurant, we better make it undeniably funny and tight.
We went through one workout and three spanks, not to mention many sketch open mics and variety shows. We had an amazing run of six months. We got to take this show out to Los Angeles. And it’s still so fucking fun to do. I’m genuinely sad that the show is ending… but So It Goes. Let’s end this show with a fucking bang, the way Billy Joel would. Let’s celebrate this god of a man through the long night.
Thank you to everyone who’s come out to see it. Thanks to everyone who’s told us you enjoyed it and who supported it. It truly means the world to me to hear that people like it. It was just a silly joke title over a year ago, and now it’s the thing I’m the most proud of in my seven years of being here in New York.
And special thanks to Dan Klein and Will Hines, without who’s guidance and advice this project would never come to light. They pushed Don and I to reach a standard we never dreamed possible but something we should all be striving for. I could write for hours on how amazing they both are. And also special thanks to Alex Adan… who for six months has pitched great jokes for us and has NAILED this tech heavy show every single night without fail.
One last show. Tonight. If you have a girlfriend, tell her about it.
This show is awesome. I’m from Long Island and we sign a blood oath at birth to like Billy Joel. But even if you happen to not like Billy, you will still love this show. It’s super funny and tight as hell. Go while you still can!
VERY VERY FUNNY SHOW ABOUT A VERY TALENTED MUSICIAN.
Also I love this story. Great shows always involved a lot of hard work and it’s good to be reminded of that.
"I’m pretty sure I have psychic abilities. I got ripped off really badly by a con artist one time. Then years later, on a hunch, I walked over to the jail to see if he’d ever gotten arrested. Not only was he there, but I showed up just in time to have a say in his parole proceedings. Plus I’m really good at guessing what time it is."
me too. one time I predicted every plot point of The Big Chill while watching it for the first time. They call me The Big Chill Whisperer.
fuck you, caroline. kevin kline hates you.
All hail The Big Chill Whisperer, All hail Caroline!
This Monday night, Legs For Days has Maude Night all to itself as Bellvue visits San Francisco! It’ll be a super-sized show of boobs and pills and musclemen and daredevils and song, and you should come.
Legs For Days is Ann Carr, Daniel Chamberlain, Shalyah Evans, Jason Flowers, Karin Hammerberg, Michael Hartney, Hunter Nelson, Jared Neumark, Livia Scott, Katie Simon, Matt Starr, and Joel Weidl, directed by Benjamin Apple. Reservations here.
This. Show. Is on fiiiii-yahhhhh!
this will be a good fun time for everyone.
Great show coming up Monday night.
Come see this show tomorrow night! Legs for Days killed beloved Maude team Bellevue so we could do an hour long show. Don’t let Bellevue die in vain.